I’m back in the same coffee shop from my previous post. It is silent and tranquil. The owner of the coffee shop knows me by name, and she says it so sweetly. The music playing has a lo-fi vibe, which is perfect for writing in my opinion. My tea is refreshing with subtle hints of cactus blossom. My body aches less, and my mind feels a bit more clear.
It’s suppose to be quite warm today, around the mid 90’s. I use to dream of days like today, now I can happily say that I get to live in these moments daily. My tan is beginning to appear darker with each day, and my skin remains clear due to the vitamin D.
It’s been a while since I have had one of these days. That kind of day where you feel like nothing can disturb your peace of mind. I am going to pursue the kind of day where I can lay in bed tonight and blissfully say that it was a good day.
It’s such a mystery how the mind and body dance with grace to fabricate positive outcomes when there’s an entirely conflicting and dark side as it’s shadow.
I’ve been searching for myself for a while now, and I’m determined to find her within the glow of the sun and the twilight of the moon. Each day and night is an opportunity for growth.
I never really understood why, but I have so many people constantly reaching out to me, asking how I managed to move 2,000 miles away from everything and everyone I grew up around at such a young age. Then I started to realize that I’m almost too independent for my own good, and not every one has the ability to just get up and go. I figured I would dig into my thoughts on this subject to help others who are seeking the possibility to move and start a new journey.
I get asked questions such as:
“Why did you want to move away?”
“What has been challenging? Rewarding?”
“Why do I stay?”
“What do I miss about my home town vs. where I live now?”
“What advice would you give someone who is wanting to move from their home town?”
Well, my friends, lets get into it.
First off, let me explain that I am from a small town in Oregon. I spent much of my time in Springfield/Eugene since many of my friends lived there, and my school was there as well. It wasn’t a glamorous city, but it was home. I knew it like the back of my hand, and everyone pretty much knew each other, or dated one another.
This brings me to my reasoning of why I wanted to move away. Now, I do not have bitter feelings toward my home town, nor any one that lived there, I was jut simply tired of living the same 24 hours every single day. I was in a rut, and as much as I didn’t want to admit it, it caused me deliberate unhappiness. The weather was something that really effected me as well. It was cold, wet, and numbing; mentally and physically. Some people love it (Mom, if you’re reading this, I’m talking to you), but I definitely thrive in the sunshine. Throughout my childhood, my family and I would take trips to Arizona around the holidays every year. I fell in love with the city of Scottsdale, which is where my grandma’s vacation home resided. I remember telling myself at a young age, that I would live here someday. That someday ended up being a few weeks after I graduated high school.
My moving experience was not all sunshine and rainbows. I faced many challenges that I didn’t consider until they started happening to me. I was so hyped on the idea of living on my own and having so much freedom, that I didn’t even think about how lonely I was. I thought I was doing all of the right things for myself, such as going to school, going to work, grocery shopping, working out, and just being an adult. Soon after doing all of this repeatedly for a few months, I realized that I was back in a rut of unhappiness. I wasn’t content with my performance in school, I didn’t like my job at the time, I was in a suffocating relationship, and the stress was causing me to eat my weight in peanut butter. I sat myself down, prioritized, and took action. I started working for Dutch Bros again, which was a huge source of happiness for me. I’ve met so many of my friends since working there, even my current boyfriend. I took a break from school, and am now in a healthy routine. The challenges will be endless, but I have peace in knowing that I made it through those hard times, and I’m better prepared for more.
Now, the most rewarding thing I have obtained from this big move, is my improvement in self awareness. I am more aware of my feelings, actions, and just all around sense of self. I know what I want, when I want it, and how to get it. I really feel like I have grown into someone I never thought I could be. I have learned how to be more selfless, loving, patient, and kind. I have also created relationships that I couldn’t see myself having back in Oregon. Starting life over in a new city challenges you to get outside of your comfort zone. When you go from feelings so completely broken and lonely, you really get a grasp of how good it feels to connect with other human beings.
I’ll be honest…Oregon summer’s are my weakness. Every time I go back to visit my family over the summer, I fall in love all over again. I want to stay so bad. Some of my best friends are there, so are my pets, and the ability to constantly be doing an outdoor activity. Once I get my hands on a fishing pole, I suddenly have an incredible amount of patience. Once I get my hiking shoes on, I could adventure on all day and night. I miss those summer memories. I’ve never felt more content than when I am canoeing up river to my favorite island, sitting by a fire under the stars with my friends, or picking fresh blueberries with my mom. Unfortunately, Oregon summers only last about three months. That’s where the love fades and I have to come back to reality, and Arizona. I could easily move back, as I feel I am more accepting to rain now, but half of my heart is in Arizona. I stay because I am happy with the life I have created. Oregon will always be home, but there is only a small town with so little to offer. I’ve done all the growing that I could there.
My advice to anyone who is craving the adventure that is being held hostage from them in their home town is to just freaking go. I didn’t think about it too much, I just knew why and where I wanted to go, and I went. I made it happen because it felt right in my heart. Yes, you leave behind so much, but you have a ton to learn and gain as well. Your friends will always be your friends, and your family will always be your family. They will understand if you want to leave and experience new things. You can be happy some where else, too. It will always be home. You can always return. Also, make sure you’re financially prepared. That would be shit if you moved, ran out of money within a few months, and had to move back home. Have a nice amount saved up, enough to last you three to four months so you can be well off until you get a job. Another piece of advice I can offer is to be very aware of your surroundings. Carry pepper spray, a knife, a gun, anything to protect yourself in case of emergency. It’s a dog eat dog world out there, and people are crazy.
Lastly, take care of yourself. Be fearless, hard-working, care free, and good-natured. Good things will come to you. I hope this gave some of you the courage to take the next step in your life. Feel free to leave comments or questions below, or reach out in the contact category. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!